Drag Race Music!

If you are new here and you don’t know me, let me put a little disclaimer right at the top: my favorite genres of music (in order) are R&B (from 1988ish to 2002ish especially), country (from bluegrass to pop country to stadium bro country), and indie rock (specifically of the PBR and checkered Vans variety).

Additionally, if the music isn’t interesting, I don’t care how good the lyrics are — I won’t like it.
If the production is bad, I don’t care how talented the voice is — I won’t like it.
And if you’re “rapping” because you can’t actually sing, I’m already bored.

I say this because all art is subjective and it depends on your taste. If you already know your favorite genres of music are diva pop and thumpa-thumpa circuit, this isn’t the list for you. Meaning, I don’t read movie reviews from The Independent because they don’t like what I like so that’s not gonna help me figure out what to go see at the cinema.

Anyway, I have recently become obsessed with the EP from #1 on this list, so I decided to see if any of the other Drag Race queens were making any bops I might like. As a whole, I avoid their I Just Got Eliminated Here’s My Single To Cash In On My Temporary Notoriety offerings because they’re almost always bad. With the exception of Trixie Mattel and Blair St. Clair, most of them aren’t giving me recording artist so much as a drag queen giving their fanbase something to spend money on. 

But there are some bops! And some flops. So let’s go from worst to best of the 20 most recent Drag Race songs I’ve come across these past few months.

20. Yvie Oddly, US Season 11 (Winner)

Sick Bitch (ft. Willow Pill)

This is drag music at its worst. It’s mixed badly so you can’t actually hear what they’re saying, but I don’t really care, because I couldn’t finish it anyway.

(You’ll see me type “drag music” a lot and by that I mean, most drag queens cannot sing. They also cannot rap. So they speak their lyrics, which have very basic rhyme schemes, over a boring club beat that your local queen would perform well to with sound effects and little breaks for short monologues from campy movies and viral video clips. All drag music isn’t terrible…but most of it is very boring and repetitive.)

19. Eureka!, All Stars Season 6 (Runner-Up)

Come Together

Eureka! is not a vocalist and this would not be a good ballad even if she sang it like Whitney Houston. The message is nice but, again, I could not finish.

18. Love Masisi, Holland Season 2 (8th Place)

Speed Limit

I’m crushed y’all. When she performed this on the show, it was my favorite song from the talent show episode. It’s still one of my favorites on the list from a production standpoint but WOW what a disappointing lack of Autotune. I’m actually against the industry’s reliance on pitch correction these days, but this could have been a bop if she knew what key she was supposed to be in.

17. Karen From Finance, Down Under Season 1 (Runner-Up)

Out of Office

This is a very cute video, which I expect from Karen because it’s such a fully realized character. Bonus points for recycling her Drag Race outfits, because they’re really expensive and any Finance girl should be getting her money’s worth with multiple wears. Other than the instrumental going on during the verse, this is wholly forgettable. Listenable, but barely enjoyable.

16. Priyanka, Canada Season 1 (Winner)

Come Through (feat. Lemon)

Very boring drag music. I didn’t finish because I was very very bored and I wanted to move on to something else.

15. Brooke Lynn Hytes, US Season 11 (Runner-Up)

Queen of the North (feat. Priyanka)

Also very boring drag music, but marginally more interesting than “Come Through.” The production is excellent though and very expensive looking.

14. Kita Mean, Down Under Season 1 (Winner)

Kita Mean

Kita actually has a pretty good singing voice for a recording studio. It’s definitely a notch above anyone on the list so far, but I wish the final production was mixed to highlight it better. Alas, the song is completely uninteresting and there’s some far better 80s/New Wave to come later on the list.

13. Ginger Minj, All Stars Season 6 (Runner-Up)

Gummy Bear

We’re finally getting into songs that I enjoy, or at least don’t mind listening to. This is obviously drag music, but Ginger has a decent singing voice, and there’s some variety in the production that keeps it interesting and listenable. I personally do not find Ginger amusing in any way so these lyrics do nothing for me on a comedic level, but as a song it’s very Meghan Trainer by way of RuPaul and that’s not the most offensive way to describe a pop song.

12. Alaska Thunderfuck, All Stars Season 2 (Winner)

Red

When did Alaska go mainstream? I don’t think I’ve paid attention to her since her speaksing breathmonotone industrialpop offerings, but this is all the way late 90s/early 00s pop. She’s not a vocalist and it’s not quite radio-ready, but it’s a song. Shoutout to the icon Jazell Barbie Royale in the video! I don’t know why she’s there, but I like it.

11. Jan, All Stars Season 6 (7th Place)

(Put Your) Gay Hands Up feat. Alaska and Peppermint

The individual parts of this song are fine, but none of them go together. It’s finished, it’s polished, it’s disco, it should be great, but it feels like a Maxi Challenge with Alaska’s breathy whisper and Peppermint’s last-minute appearance. Can’t believe I’m saying this, but I wish it was just Jan from start to finish.

10. Kylie Sonique Love, All Stars Season 6 (Winner)

Do It Like Dolly

It’s impossible to make a terrible song from the “9 to 5” beat, so this is automatically fun. Musically it’s a lot more interesting (though less moving) than her ballad she put out around the same time, but it’s a solid offering. Getting Miss Shalae to lead the diamond in the choreo is an extra special bonus. All in all, it feels like something Shannon Bex would’ve done if she’d stuck with it.

9. Rosé, US Season 13 (3rd/4th Place)

The Devil In The Details

It’s giving Adam Lambert. It’s giving glam pop. It’s giving vocalist who isn’t overdoing it. But it’s giving a little boring. All the ingredients are there, but it’s not a song I need to hear on repeat because there’s no chorus that grabs you. This is a natural showman who studied music, so that just goes to show you that writing solid hooks is harder than it looks.

8. LaLa Ri, US Season 13 (10th Place)

Bad Bitch Tip (feat. Ocean Kelly)

This is just fun. And it’s a step above drag music because LaLa is a passable emcee who isn’t just talking over a beat. If Big Freedia and City Girls had a baby on the track, it would be this song.

7. Violet Chachki, US Season 7 (Winner)

Mistress Violet (with Allie X)

Okay….honestly, this isn’t really my taste. A couple of my friends have this song on repeat, but this sound is not for me personally. The whole thing (especially the aesthetic of the video) is very Bushwick Artsy Left of Mainstream in that space where Souxsie Soux meets the early B-52s meets DIY mixed with Couture. I put it so high because I love how finished and interesting it is compared to repeats of the same thing over and over that most of the Drag Race girls tend to put out.

6. Monét X Change, All Stars Season 4 (Winner)

Love Like This

Monét has the best voice on this list and this song is radio-ready! It’s not a song to capitalize on a Drag Race fanbase at all. It’s just music. A Caribbean lilt with an actual chorus and horns on the track all add up to an excellent summertime moment.

5. Trixie Mattel, All Stars Season 3 (Winner)

Jackson (feat. Orville Peck)

I debated whether or not a cover should make it onto this list, but I couldn’t not have Trixie on a countdown about Drag Race music. She makes my favorite albums from across the franchise (RuPaul included) because we have the same taste in country and Trixie can write a hook (which is a skill so sorely missing from most of the Drag Race arena). She and Orville make a fine pair on this old cover because Trixie might not be the best singer, but she always delivers and she stays in her lane. This is toe-tapping excellence.

4. Sederginne, Holland Season 1 (6th Place)

Fuck Me (1.5M Away)

I’m surprised this is on the list because:

Sederginne can’t sing.
I don’t like “funny” songs.

I genuinely and unironically love this track though. You could actually write a very standard pop song with this instrumental — it’s straight from the early 00s teen pop playbook. That makes it enjoyable in the way that Doja Cat’s “Mooo!” was a few years ago, because it’s a solid composition, with ridiculous lyrics. Sederginne as a horny old lady trying to get laid during COVID is camp and she delivered every line perfectly.

3. Bimini, UK Season 2 (Runner-Up)

God Save This Queen

The tiniest supermodel in the world (seriously, how is she always so booked?!) is doing drag music of the highest caliber. If you’re not the greatest singer and you’re not the greatest emcee, how do you avoid making another boring dance track? Don’t make a dance track at all! Give us new wave 80s punk with clever lyrics about gender and do it with a snarling East London delivery.

2. Shea Coulee, All Stars Season 5 (Winner)

Collide (with GESS feat. Mykki Blanco)

This is music. This is current R&B. This is Quiet Storm for Gen Z. Shea’s vocals are so silky smooth and the production is as polished as anything from Ari Lennox or Summer Walker or HER. It does fall into the Normani “Wild Side” trap of featuring a rapper where none was needed, but it’s a forgivable misstep for such an excellent song. Without the feature, it would probably squeak into my top 20 R&B songs of the year. It’s that good.

1. Tia Kofi, UK Season 2 (7th Place)

Part 1: The Damage

Obsessed with this EP. OBSESSED! Tia Kofi is one of my favorite Drag Queens in the history of Drag Race. Is she fashionable? No. Is her makeup great? No. Does she have fabulous wigs? No. Is she confident? Also no. Is she a great performer? Sometimes. Does she have undeniable star quality? Ehhhh…..debateable. Is she funny? Absolutely. Tia Kofi is the most naturally funny drag queen to ever compete for the crown. I rarely laugh at people who are trying to be funny, because it’s so forced and I don’t love comedy. Tia had me howling every episode. She’s the only queen where I’ve said, “I really want to see that clip again where she….” and looked it up on Youtube. This will probably be my favorite runway forever.

So imagine my surprise that Comedy Legend (er Comedic Person) Tia Kofi would come out with the most excellent 80s synthpop EP! I don’t even have to put a “drag queen” disclaimer when I recommend it to someone. It’s not “oh listen to this! This is really good for Drag Race!” It’s just “oh listen to this, it’s so good!” It’s pure pop. She doesn’t have the biggest voice in the world, but it’s perfect for what she’s doing. I hope she’s soaking in all the good reviews of her music and taking it to heart, because she’s not really giving what needs to be given in some of her videos, but with a little extra confidence, I think there’s a star in there.

Outside In

Look What You’ve Done (with Cahill)

Loving Me Like That

So that’s it! That’s all I’ve heard recently. If y’all have some bops that I’ve missed, let me know and I’ll add them. But don’t send me anything boring!